Kumbatia San

I got my first period at 11.
It wasn’t a rite of passage — it was depressing.
The pain was so intense that it defined my months, my mood, and my milestones. By 20, I was officially diagnosed with PCOS, but by then I had already normalized a level of suffering that should never be “normal.”

At my all-girls school, PMS and cramps were everyday talk. Some of us even had “period prescriptions” and were told to take two days off school each cycle — one before, one during. We joked about it. We bonded over it. But the truth is: we couldn’t actually function.

For years, I cycled through gynecologists who dismissed my pain, assumed it was “just an infection,” or worse, suggested it was STD-related — despite the fact that I had never tested positive for one. I wasn’t being believed. I wasn’t being heard.

By accident, I found Dr. Al, a French gynecologist who broke from the “typical” South African treatment path. He took me seriously. He went for an aggressive HRT approach that I didn’t fully understand — but I understood the results: I went from endless hospital stays and days lost in bed to being able to work through my period. That intervention changed my life.

But it also gave me perspective. I had taken my progress for granted until I sat down recently with Yoschini Govender to discuss her upcoming novel on endometriosis. Endo was a word I had heard many times but never really stopped to research. Yoschini opened my eyes — not only to the staggering number of women it affects, but also to the silences around it.

I also learned from voices like Tania Morgan, who spoke about navigating womanhood with honesty and courage, and MiQuann, whose work in developing sexual health products is reshaping how women care for themselves. Together, these conversations reminded me that our struggles and innovations as women are not rare — they’re simply too often ignored.

It made me reflect: why aren’t we having these conversations more openly? Why do we only whisper about fertility, hormones, perimenopause, or postpartum struggles? Why do we still carry shame around the very cycles that shape our lives?

I’m not “team free-bleed” — I don’t encourage it for health reasons. But I am team period panties and reusable pads. For me, it’s part environmental choice, part necessity for sensitive skin and eczema. It’s what makes my body feel cared for. And that, I’ve learned, is what matters most: finding what works for you and being unapologetic about it.

Now, as I enter the final stretch of my 20s, I find myself confronting new fears: perimenopause (self-diagnosed, if I’m honest — I’m still too scared to go back to the gynecologist), the ticking cultural expectations of marriage and children, and the uncertainty of what womanhood “should” look like. But here’s my truth: I’ve also made peace with the idea that I could live a deeply fulfilling life without a husband or kids. That feels freeing.

This week’s Breath & Brunch podcast episode dives into these conversations we don’t have enough of:

Living with PCOS and endometriosis.

Fertility, hormones, and the silent battles we normalize.

The stigma around reproductive health.

And what it truly means to be a woman navigating pain, identity, and choice.

We debated editing parts out — but decided to keep it raw and real. In fact, we’re even planning a follow-up conversation with my gynecologist on high-risk pregnancies, abortion, and postpartum realities.

Because women deserve more than whispered warnings. We deserve honesty, empathy, and space to breathe.

Catch the full episode on YouTube

#PCOSAwareness #EndometriosisAwareness #WomensHealth #HormonalHealth #FertilityJourney #Perimenopause #BreathAndBrunch #KumbatiaHealth #PodcastConversations #WomenInWellness